Friday 4 January 2013

Stop...Wait...Watch Out...

They're here, they're alive, and they're the nastiest group of characters you've ever met.  These wheeled psychos are the wildest group of whatevers you'll ever meet.  There's more than you'll ever know, but try to meet them all, 'cause they're the latest rage.....
SAVAGE MONDO BLITZERS!
 - from the Savage Mondo Blitzers card back


"These wheeled psychos are the wildest group of whatevers".  I love that!  That pretty much sums this line up.  A mixed and matched bunch of freaks that'll appeal to you whether you love weird figures, toy cars, whatever (well, weird toy cars - regular toy cars are boring).  

DAMAGED AND DEADLY GANG

Here we go!  This is the last (regularly released) Savage Mondo Blitzers 4-pack to be covered!  This motley crew of crazies is one of the more interesting sets in the series, and despite their extra unusual looks, I've always seen them as good guys.

HEAD ALERT

Head Alert is one of my favorite figures in the series.  He's just a giant two-armed head on a giant foot. With pistols.  And I don't know why, but I've always pictured him with a gruff "police chief" type of personality.  I mean, it doesn't make sense; what with the orange mohawk, the studded bracelet, the wicked scar...  I just can't get the whole police chief thing out of my head.  The idea popped in there, and I guess it's sticking.  In my old Mondo Blitzers stories there was one big team of good guys versus one big team of bad guys, and Head Alert was the leader of the good guys (they all reported to him like he was their chief).  I've pretty much put that idea aside, but his police chief mentality is still there.  Aside from that, I can't decide where I'd have Head Alert come from.  Is he a grotesquely mutated human?  I suppose he could be, but I think it's more fun to imagine a whole race of these head things out there somewhere.  So I guess for me, he's an alien.

MR. MUTATOR HEAD

Mr. Mutator Head is clearly a superhero, which helps push this whole team into good guy territory for me.  Now every superhero needs a superpower (well, except Batman... and the Punisher... okay, MOST superheroes), but what would his be?  I bet he can fly.  Lasers from the eyes?  Why not?  Maybe he's a shapeshifter.  His name is Mr. Mutator Head, maybe only his head can shapeshift.  That would be weird for Marvel or DC, but not the Savage Mondo Blitzers.  He thwarts evil, protects the innocent, and saves the day, all with nothing but his shapeshifting head and damaged (but deadly) teammates!

CHOP CHOP

If there's a dud figure in this set, it's Chop Chop.  He's not overly boring per se.  I mean, he's a samurai-looking dude and those were big back in the early 90's.  Hell, samurai are still cool today.  He's got a sword, that's not bad.  He's not as weird as anyone else on his team, but this team sets the weirdness bar high.  I think it might just be that he looks so pained doing whatever it is that he's doing.  Maybe he's just getting old and swinging the ol' sword isn't as easy as it used to be.  I mean, his eyes aren't even open!  I guess he could be a blind swordsman, those are always interesting.  And he doesn't have to like what he does.  When mutants, aliens, and robots use your planet as a battleground, what do you do?  You pick up your sword and defend yourself.  And then you sit down and rest.  "Kids these days!".

BLOOD HOCKEY

And then there's Blood Hockey!  If anyone was holding the team back from pure "good guy-ness", it's this guy.  I suppose he can fight on the side of good, but he's messy about it.  Just look at that jagged, bloody hockey stick!  Maybe he's like an axe murderer on the battlefield, but when the battle is done he likes to relax with a good book and a nice cup of cocoa (with marshmallows off course, he likes the way they dissolve in his mouth).  He probably uses those little reading glasses too.  But when duty calls, it's awn!


On a side note, each 4-pack comes with these little plastic trays to display the figures while they're on the card.  I kept those, and use them to store my Mondo Blitzers.  Now you know!

Well, only one team left!  Though this next one might be a two-parter...


1 comment:

  1. Ha! Yeah I agree, Chop Chop is pretty dang boring in this toyline of freaks. I mean...you wana do a samurai, then give 'em the armor, make 'em huge, and make 'em threatening! This guy's sword looks too heavy and I think he's asleep.

    And I totally called Head Alert being your favorite! I saw him on the top of the page and thought: "Yeah, there's his favorite." I bet that's one that loves having the giant rollerskate.

    As for Mr. Mutator Head, I imagine he can turn his head into objects for fighting, like blades 'n stuff.

    Finally: Blood Hockey. I'd have to go back and look over the names, but he's gotta be high on the list of best names. Classic 90's!

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